Women Like Legos Too

There was a story lately about a little girl who was kicked out of a Christian private school for wearing her hair short, and being a tomboy and it saddened me.  She is 8-years old.  Kids should be left alone to figure out their own opinions about whom they are and what their style is.  We may want them to dress “cute” or “handsome” and, follow the norm, if for their own sake, so they’re not mercilessly teased.  But, if a child has strong opinions about themselves and who they are, I would like to think I’d encourage that.   (Unless they are my own kids and want many piercings or gigantic holes in their earlobes.)

When I was a child I considered myself a tomboy and definitely enjoyed “boy activities” more.  I liked sports a lot, and I did NOT like barbies.  Ever.  I still hate barbies to this day, and I truly hope that my daughter never wants one, but the way things are going so far, they’re bound to enter our house.   Oh, and there I said it….”my daughter”…. What about my son?  Why did I not say “I hope my son doesn’t want one”?  Well, because it just didn’t occur to me.   It’s weird.  We have a son and a daughter, and they are being raised the same, yet Jingle has gravitated towards dinosaurs and cars and Savvy has gravitated toward Minnie Mouse and princesses.  They both like legos and animals.  I think I’m gender neutral when it comes to things they want to play with, but if they want to play with something that I don’t personally like well then.  Too bad.  Please please please let the Princess phase not last long, and Barbies stay AWAY.   Fortunately Jingle is not into guns, because they too would be on my list of hate-toys.

When I was pregnant with Jingle, I did not want to know the sex of the baby.  One reason for this was because I did not want other people to know the sex prior to the baby being born because I didn't want to be inundated with either pink or blue.   When we had a son, I think I was a little relieved when it came to the clothes because boy clothes are easy.    There were no frills and fluffiness and tights to figure out.  There was no pink.  And then, my daughter was born.   And now, I can’t imagine her in anything other than pink.  She just looks so good in it and she LOVES it.  What is with little girls and pink??  And, I will admit, I love it when she wants to wear a dress or skirt.  She is already more of a girlie girl then I ever was, and damn she’s cute.  She’s got us all wrapped around her little pink sparkly fingers.

According to Savvy, this is "Grandpa"

When it comes to their toys, I would rather play legos and sports, then make up imaginary games with animals.  I remember loving that as a child – playing with my own stuffed animals for hours on end – but now I can’t stand that game.  Give me legos or blocks though and I’m good.    Jingle got a Star Wars lego set for Christmas and I’ve been dying to put it together with him.  It just sits in his closet.  When I ask him about it he says that he wants to do it with Grandma and Grandpa (who we see often).  Finally tonight, I practically whined and said “Fine! Then maybe you should get me lego sets for MY birthday!”  At which point he said “They don’t have legos for women.”.  

Oh no he DI’NT just say that...(and might I ask.. what does that say about Grandma who is allowed to do the Star Wars lego set, but not me?).  I think I did a head jerk and finger snap as I said “Excuse me??  Oh no  you didn’t say that...what are women lego sets?!”  He knew that he hit a nerve with Mama, but my son will be my everlasting challenge when it comes to butting heads as he grows up.  He does not back down and our stubborn horns will undoubtedly clash.. “well… they’re pink… [said with a sly grin]”.  At this point I felt it was important to make a point, because we’ve had other conversations recently where it has become apparent that other students talk about this in kindergarten and have clear definitions about what is okay for a boy and what is okay for a girl…I don’t want him to pigeon hole girls or boys into only liking certain things or colors because of their sex.   I told him that I like Star Wars and I’m also a big fan of the Avenger series now too (what? Girls like super heroes??).   He wasn’t ready for this "heavy" discussion however since he knew bedtime was close and he wanted to play with Daddy before the clock turned blue and the children turned to pumpkins.  And, I’ll admit..he’s FIVE…So, I let it go.   But, this won't be the last time we'll discuss this and I will continue to encourage both kids to do whatever they want regardless of if has been previously labeled a "boy activity" or a "girl activity".  And, even if they don't want to do it themselves, they should not criticize others who may, as we are all wonderfully unique and independent individuals.