On Thursday I read Karin’s Chronicles and she mentioned that she had recently visited the dentist where she was assisted by a wacky hygienist. I had a dentist appointment later that same afternoon and became nervous when I realized that I go to the same dentist office as Karin.
Now, I have never enjoyed going to the dentist – I hate it when they stick pointy tools in my mouth and then ask me, “have you been flossing?” But on Thursday, the one saving grace of going was that I was looking forward to lying down in the dentist chair and closing my eyes while I had my teeth cleaned. I had been tired all day, and thought I could use that time to rest. But alas, it was not to be…
Sure enough, when I arrived, I discovered that I had the exact same wacky hygienist that Karin had a week earlier. She talked endlessly. Of course, she immediately asked me if I floss everyday, and since I can’t tell a lie, I said, “no”. So, she then asked on average, how many times a week, to which I responded “two” (as of the last two weeks – so I guess I can lie a little...). From then on, she told me why I need to floss, how to floss, when to floss during the day, how to brush, the importance of brushing and on and on and on…. I do need to caveat this by saying that I had perfect bill of health for my teeth and gums – however she still felt the need to impart all of her 34 years of hygienist-knowledge on me, as if it was the first time I’d ever been to the dentist in my life. She also talked about herself too…and occasionally would ask me questions, ultimately ending in “right?” To which I had to respond “garh” since she had tools in my mouth. But, I had to respond – or else she’d continue to ask me again and again.
Here are some of the things she told me that day:
“Not flossing may lead to heart disease. Scientists are now trying to tie back how plaque build-up, which is bacteria, eventually leads to other diseases.”
“When I was 6, my dentist slapped me across the face to get me to open my mouth up. (I won’t do that to you har, har)”
“You have to brush in short quick strokes, for 3 to 4 minutes, because you don’t want to tear your gums up”
“20 years ago I almost knocked myself out cold when I ran headfirst into the old cast-iron x-ray machines they used to have. Did you know you can really see stars and birds floating around when that happens?”
“I’ve never been married, I just haven’t found the person that I want to be with”
“Did you know some people will just spit out blood, and not think anything of it – but if they saw that blood coming from an arm or leg, they would be much more concerned? It’s important to keep your gums healthy.”
“I started in my twenties, now I’m in my fifties, I’ve been a hygienist for 34 years.”
“If you don’t keep your gums healthy….”
And so it went. I never did get my rest in the dentist chair as I couldn’t wait to get out of there. My teeth and gums were fine, and fortunately for all the talking she did, at least she did a good job cleaning my teeth, but has anyone seen my floss?
5 comments:
My grandpa lost all his teeth in his 30's because of gum disease (he brushed but did not floss--how's that for scare tactics?)
Even so, I have gone through a rather lazy "anti-flossing" period in my life the past 4 months. My next teeth cleaning is coming up in a few weeks--thanks for reminding me that I still have time to be able to tell them I've been flossing.
And isn't it weird that dental folks can make you feel like you're in confessional?
"Forgive me, Chatty Kathy, but I have sinned. It has been....3 weeks since my last flossing, and I had homicidal thoughts while listening to you at the last visit..."
I heard the bit about spitting out blood too! And she also would ask questions and wait for answers. I understand wanting to be social at your job, but let's have some common sense, shall we?
Manoa--IT IS LIKE CONFESSIONAL! And you're not even Catholic! Who told you the secret about our club? The next thing you're going to be walking around giving out the Chi-O handshake. O wait, I was ex-communicated, I'll show it to you!
Ha! I showed KT the handshake eons ago. Or maybe that was the Chi Phi lil-sister handshake. Potatayto, Patahto.
Hygenistis are definitely the Nazi's of the dentistry world. No floss for you!! My dentist is super nice (thanks for the referral, Debbie!!), but I still hate going. The only thing positive (besides having clean teeth) is that I am fondly reminded of that Christmas movie with Hermie the elf who wanted to be a dentist and ends up at the island of misfit toys.
KB - No problem for the referral!
My current dentist was a referral from my mother-in-law, but they have a knack for torturing me. Oh sure, they're nice enough, but just when I think that they aren't that bad, they bring me to the brink of tears with their instruments of evil. And I'm a tough cookie in the dentist chair... 5 years of orthodontics have prepared me well!
I was actually thinking of switching to Karin's/Meghan's dentist when I return (since KVF had such glowing remarks about them in the past), but these recent blogs are making me think twice. Maybe the hour and a half drive to my old dentist in Davis wouldn't be so bad after all.
Oh, and my dentist has also informed me of the increased risk of not only heart disease but stroke too if you neglect to floss regularly. (I personally think it is all a guilt conspiracy by the National Dental Association to get us to buy more floss!)
I agree - I think it's a conspiracy by floss companies to get you to buy more. They give so much away free at the dentist that they need to insure a way that you will also buy at the store too. Floss Up Ladies!
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