A Surprising Success

This past month has been a very busy one. I've already mentioned that work is hectic, and Mr. Mingle is in a play, but I have also been busy planning a surprise 60th birthday for my dad (Pop). I first got the idea to throw it only 6 weeks ago, so my party planning skills were kicked into high gear immediately. I originally thought it would be easy after planning my wedding last year... I still don't think anything is as involved as planning a wedding... however this party still proved challenging. I immediately began trying to find addresses of Pop's old friends which was difficult considering I couldn't ask the main man directly and my step mom doesn't share the same address book. Not to mention she was in Hawaii for two weeks with Pop during the initial planning stages so she was pretty much out of contact.

I enlisted my aunt to get me some addresses, but that took a few weeks, so in the meantime I went on an internet search. I found one of Pop's old coworkers and called him up, which fortunately turned out to be the right connection. After flubbing through the initial conversation with his wife, "Hi, I'm Mingle, I used to be Smith's daughter..." "You used to be Smith's daugher, but you aren't anymore?" she quickly replied.. "no, ha ha, I'm still Smith's daugher, but now I'm Mingle..." she gave me addresses of other old coworkers so I sent those invites out.

I then searched through old emails from Pop, to see if there was anyone on the CC list who I could contact. This proved fruitful for a few gentleman from Pop's other life. "Hi", I would write, "I don't know who you are, but I found your address on an email from my dad, would you like to come to his party?"

Invitations went out to about 50, and 30 were expected. Then the other plans started...many calls with the stepmom and aunt both of whom I don't speak to on a regular basis. "yes, yes" says Mingle, "I did consider buying food..." "yes, I did invite my family", "Yes, I am getting alcohol..." I found myself repeating many conversations over and over, because in my mind, I had everything planned and under control and just needed others to bring a few items. The others thought I was not buying anything and went out and bought over and above what we needed. ("Yes, yes I did bring plates (read: I'm not an idiot, please leave me alone)". During the last two weeks stepmom called even more, "Hey Mingle, I invited so and so's mom....Hey Mingle, my son is bringing his 3 friends - they know Smith....Hey Mingle, I invited the gardner and the tenants..." I was kind of waiting for the postman and garbage man to show up, but alas they must not have run into my stepmom in time. Finally, I realized that 50 would most likely be the number. Some would come, but not respond, some would respond but not come, and some would just show up. So, about two weeks ago anytime someone asked, "how many people are coming?" I'd just respond - "Oh, about 50". Sure enough... it was right.

My mother, who is the last person I wanted to ask to help me (because she is no longer married to my father), realized the state of panic and stress I was in about 2 weeks ago and went out and bought all the decorations for me. I can't say thank you enough. Pop's friends picked up the key to the Senior Center (that's where we through the party - GREAT irony) and came to help me set up. They also led the cleaning brigade at the end of the party, and had almost everything done, (along with Fossie the mopper) before I needed to lift a finger. This was the first time I have thrown a party where I didn't have to do the cleaning. Grateful doesn't even begin to explain what I felt tonight.

But, the best part, was seeing how pleased Pop was. He has been Mr. Grumpy McGrumpigus leading up to his 60th birthday. He's been down, and a sour puss, and just resisting the whole idea of getting older. But tonight, for the first time in a few months, he was happy. Happy, touched and genuinely surprised. And that made all the planning worth it.