Does Your Boss Speak to You Like This?

Many of you have already heard this story, but I can't resist including it here because I still think of it often and wonder,... "What the Hell??!!"

(As a primer on the chain of command... I report to Joker who reports to Major Dick. LulaBell is my counterpart)

On Tuesday, January 15, I attended a meeting in Major Dick's office with Joker and LulaBell because LulaBell wanted to give Major Dick an update on a project she is working on. I attended for moral support.

During the course of the meeting Major Dick started to ask Joker and I questions that weren’t related to LulaBell's topic. I was afraid that she wouldn’t have a chance to complete her update and also get Major Dick's “blessing” on the project so at one point I interrupted him in the middle of one of his questions and said, “Major Dick, I know that you like to veer off into other topics, so before you do, I just want to make sure that LulaBell has gotten what she needs out of this meeting.” He gave me a slightly bemused look, but then let LulaBell continue. Shortly after this the meeting ended.

About an hour later Major Dick came into my office, sat himself down and said, “I have a question for you”

Mingle: “Ok…”

Major Dick: Don’t worry it’s not related to anything that we’ve discussed, and you don’t even have to answer

Mingle: Okayy…. (could this be that he finally realizes my value, or he wants to ask a delicate question about one of my coworkers??)

Major Dick: You see, men of my generation often wonder why women of your generation would get a tattoo. (At this point he stared pointedly at me and it was obvious that he had seen my tattoo which immediately made me uncomfortable since it is on my lower back, just above my rear and the only chance he could have seen it is if I might have bent over to pick something up)

Mingle: oh! That is not the question I was expecting! And I’m a little concerned that you have even seen it – I can’t even see it! (what the hell??)

MD: More to the point – why bother to get one?

Mingle: Well… again, I must say I’m a little concerned that you have seen it at all but…

MD: Oh, well it was sometime in the old building…

Mingle: (oh great… now he admits that he has seen my tattoo which resides just above my ass 6 MONTHS ago, and has been dying to ask me this question ever since) Huh….well, in my case it means love..

MD: oh! you don't have to tell me!

Mingle: Well - you asked! (and damn it I'm not letting you off this easy Buster) It’s in Kanji which is Japanese and as I think you know I lived there for awhile. It has meaning to me.

MD: oh ok. I just thought since you mentioned in our last meeting that I like to veer off on other topics it reminded me that I’d been meaning to ask you this so I thought I would. Since we have this open communication….

Mingle: Again, I’m surprised you have seen it (and would dare talk about it. And where on earth do you get the impression that my attempt at keeping a meeting on track opens up the door for you to ask me this question??)

Major Dick: When I used to live in Texas the cowboys often had their names on the back of their belts and the joke was that if they fell down drunk in a ditch someone could walk by and know who they are by their belts. (Smirk and Stare)

Mingle: That’s not what my tattoo is for. (Phone Rings) I have to get this Major Dick – it’s a customer. (Go away now you gross, inappropriate man!)