Does Your Boss Speak to You Like This?

Many of you have already heard this story, but I can't resist including it here because I still think of it often and wonder,... "What the Hell??!!"

(As a primer on the chain of command... I report to Joker who reports to Major Dick. LulaBell is my counterpart)

On Tuesday, January 15, I attended a meeting in Major Dick's office with Joker and LulaBell because LulaBell wanted to give Major Dick an update on a project she is working on. I attended for moral support.

During the course of the meeting Major Dick started to ask Joker and I questions that weren’t related to LulaBell's topic. I was afraid that she wouldn’t have a chance to complete her update and also get Major Dick's “blessing” on the project so at one point I interrupted him in the middle of one of his questions and said, “Major Dick, I know that you like to veer off into other topics, so before you do, I just want to make sure that LulaBell has gotten what she needs out of this meeting.” He gave me a slightly bemused look, but then let LulaBell continue. Shortly after this the meeting ended.

About an hour later Major Dick came into my office, sat himself down and said, “I have a question for you”

Mingle: “Ok…”

Major Dick: Don’t worry it’s not related to anything that we’ve discussed, and you don’t even have to answer

Mingle: Okayy…. (could this be that he finally realizes my value, or he wants to ask a delicate question about one of my coworkers??)

Major Dick: You see, men of my generation often wonder why women of your generation would get a tattoo. (At this point he stared pointedly at me and it was obvious that he had seen my tattoo which immediately made me uncomfortable since it is on my lower back, just above my rear and the only chance he could have seen it is if I might have bent over to pick something up)

Mingle: oh! That is not the question I was expecting! And I’m a little concerned that you have even seen it – I can’t even see it! (what the hell??)

MD: More to the point – why bother to get one?

Mingle: Well… again, I must say I’m a little concerned that you have seen it at all but…

MD: Oh, well it was sometime in the old building…

Mingle: (oh great… now he admits that he has seen my tattoo which resides just above my ass 6 MONTHS ago, and has been dying to ask me this question ever since) Huh….well, in my case it means love..

MD: oh! you don't have to tell me!

Mingle: Well - you asked! (and damn it I'm not letting you off this easy Buster) It’s in Kanji which is Japanese and as I think you know I lived there for awhile. It has meaning to me.

MD: oh ok. I just thought since you mentioned in our last meeting that I like to veer off on other topics it reminded me that I’d been meaning to ask you this so I thought I would. Since we have this open communication….

Mingle: Again, I’m surprised you have seen it (and would dare talk about it. And where on earth do you get the impression that my attempt at keeping a meeting on track opens up the door for you to ask me this question??)

Major Dick: When I used to live in Texas the cowboys often had their names on the back of their belts and the joke was that if they fell down drunk in a ditch someone could walk by and know who they are by their belts. (Smirk and Stare)

Mingle: That’s not what my tattoo is for. (Phone Rings) I have to get this Major Dick – it’s a customer. (Go away now you gross, inappropriate man!)

It's Time...

I’ve been thinking about the blog lately – how I miss typing stories about inane things that happen in my life and complaining about work. Oh so much to talk about! But since last July it’s been difficult to come back to the blubbering blog entries that I so enjoy. However, I think I am now at a happy point that I can mention that which has not been discussed and can move on to the more mundane, less fascinating but oh so amusing aspects of life that I like to ramble about.

So, to begin the therapy session of my blog entry …. As everyone already knows who reads this blog – two months after my director oh so embarrassingly announced to the company that I was pregnant, Mr. Mingle and I lost the baby. Sad, confused and devastated pretty much sums up the next couple of months, however, our loving, understanding family and friends helped to keep our spirits in check and we knew that we were not alone. It must also be admitted here that the cats took on an even more important role in the Mingle household – they became our pseudo-children (not that we weren’t already obsessed cat-loving people).

Most of my anger was directed at work since that barely paused in the wake of our loss. My co-workers, although understanding, did not once address the elephant in the room once I returned, and my bitterness grew as the 4th Quarter sucked and all I could think about was how I was supposed to be on maternity leave and shouldn’t have been there to deal with all of the work crap in the first place. I had to train and hire new people, and it was hard to think- they have no idea what just happened to me a short few months ago, and I have no desire to talk to them, but I pushed on and just did the best I could. The 4th Quarter was really tough and I have never been more excited for a New Year to start because it really gave me the feeling of starting fresh and putting a difficult year behind us. That is not to say we wanted to forget what happened, because we never will, but it was important and helpful for me to look ahead and hope that 2008 would be happier than 2007.

Fortunately 2008 has kick-started us into a happier place. We started by celebrating Christmas in SunValley, Idaho with Mom, J and family and enjoyed the holiday in one of the more perfect snow settings you can imagine. (Complete with spending Christmas Eve dinner with Billy Baldwin and family, but I digress). I also got in a couple of fantastic days of skiing which I haven’t done in 6 years so it was so nice to do a physical activity again and see that I can still do it!

In January we celebrated Matt’s birthday with a weekend in Napa and were able to relax and enjoy each other’s company with more joy and less sadness than at the end of last year. Let me be clear however, that Mr. Mingle and I were still able to joke together and appreciate the lighter moments in life even when our loss was most near. I feel this is an aspect to our relationship that keeps us strong (as well as goofy) and helped us get through last year as well as we did.

Now we are back to our same old shenanigans (one of our favorite words) where he is acting in a play and I am playing the trumpet for an orchestra pit. We like to be busy, it’s who we are, however this time around we are not keeping busy to try to forget what happened, but we are doing the shows we love because we enjoy it. Things will happen, life goes on, and in looking back on last July and the loss of our baby, I am grateful for having been given that experience at all since I learned so much from it. The loss will always be in our memories and it will be hard for us at times even going forward, but the one thing I know for sure is – we can handle it.

So, now that the blog therapy session has come to an end, it’s time for me to get back to work and kick some ass so that I can return to the more amusing blog entries that I so enjoy writing.